Awkward
As F*ck

Your email template toolkit for conquering cringe-worthy convos without losing your shit.

$197

(Approx. $131 USD for my creative homies in the Northern Hemisphere who don’t like math)

Buy The Full Toolkit

Shan Fitzgerald with her lips pursed, looking left with an awkward expression

Put a finger down if you’ve ever…

✱ Stared at your inbox, knowing you have to send *that* email to a client, but you’d rather make sweet, sweet love to a cactus while listening to Nickelback than type one word.

✱ Found yourself smack dab in the middle of a Grade-A communications crapstorm, feeling about as in control as when you get left on “read.”

✱ Needed to chase up cash you’re owed, snag a bit more time for a project, or assert and reinforce your boundaries without pissing people off - but you didn’t know where to start.

✱ Procrastinated over an email to the point of no return. Words? MIA. The right tone? Pfft, no f*cking clue. Anxiety? Through. The. Roof.

**Not-so-fun fact: You’re not alone* mate.**

*The average small business churns out a whopping 112 emails weekly, spending over 5.5 minutes writing each one. That's 10+ hours a week glued to our inboxes, trying to figure out what the f*ck to say - and how to say it.

That’s where these email templates enter the chat.

Packed with personality, these templates are locked, loaded, and ready to handle the most anxiety-inducing scenarios, situations, and shitty convos you’ll deal with on the reg as a small creative service business owner.

No more stressin’ over your message, tone, or delivery. Do I sound okay? Is that too harsh? Too pushy? Do I sound like a b*tch? Am I coming across the right way?

Just copy, paste, tweak, hit send - and let out that breath you’ve been holding.

Inside Awkward-AF, you'll find:

54 pre-written (personality-packed) email templates across 7 modules/themes
Fill-in-the-blank prompts to make these templates your own
Clear, simple usage guidelines so you know when to send each email - and understand why it works
Write-It-Yourself tips, tricks & tweaks from a former English teacher with 10 years’ experience
Access to my curated GIF Swipe File to dial up the F-U-N
BONUS: Purchase the full toolkit and score my guided walk-through video, where I share extra tips for making these emails *your* emails

What you won’t find:

Bare bones outlines with zero personality or context
The kind of templates your English teacher used to give you
The answers to ALL of life’s awkward AF scenarios (I’m not Nostradamus, man.)

Awkward AF is not everyone’s cup of whiskey.

Full disclosure: I’ve personally sent every single one of these emails at some point in my 7 years in business as a professional brand personality strategist & copywriter, which is why I know they work.

I’ve taken the hits, so you don’t have to deal with the sh*t.

In saying that, these aren’t the right email templates for every biz owner, so make sure you can tick at least one of those boxes before you buy 👉 (No givesies-backsies.)

Awkward-AF is for:

Profesh creatives: Copywriters, designers, photographers, yadda, yadda, yadda…
Service-based businesses
Freelancers
Neurodivergent biz owners who need help with ~ vibe ~ checks
Side-hustlers. Full-time hustlers. (Any kind of ‘hustler,’ really)

It’s definitely not for:

Product-based businesses
E-commerce
Corporate tools of oppression (*shakes fist*)
Peeps who use wanky terms like ‘synergy’ and ‘let’s circle back’

The conversation may be awkward AF, but your emails don't have to be…

I've worked with brands for over a decade, and one thing I know for certain is that people hate sending follow-ups. But! The power is *in* the follow-up! When I worked in PR, the follow-up emails would land us a published story, *right* when it felt awkward to hit 'send' on the email. Shan's Awkward AF Email Toolkit is a personality-packed, copy-and-paste-able godsend for anyone in email avoidance mode.

JESS RUHFUS, NO. 2 / FORMER FOUNDER OF COLLABOSAURUS

These ain’t the kind of emails you send to your mum

This toolkit is a collection of ready-to-roll templates spread across 7 Modules (+ BONUS section!) that tackle email-y dilemmas such as:

Your roadmap to declining with dignity.
- Turning down enquiries (x2 options)
- Saying no to working with a biz bestie
- When they ask for a service you don’t provide
- When they can’t afford your services – and you ain’t budging
- When they can’t afford your services - but you want to offer options (because you’re nice like that)
- When you need a potential client to compromise on something
- Acknowledging when they don’t go ahead after their initial inquiry or discovery call
- When *you’re* not sure you want to go ahead after sussing them out
Call out (email) radio silence with the right mix of charm, cheek - and a lil’ bitchslap of accountability.
- Following up on enquiries
- Cancelled discovery call
- Following up on a verbal ‘yes’
- Following up on a proposal or quote (x3)
When your client has vanished into thin air, leaving a trail of unfinished tasks, unpaid bills, or unmet promises – and now you need to teach ‘em how to come correct.
- Chasing pre-work
- When you haven’t received any feedback/edits (and the clock is ticking)
- Out-of-scope amends from a client
- Out-of-scope tasks from a retainer client
- IP Assignment follow-up
- Chasing up payment (x3)
Making things right doesn’t have to feel wrong - and it all starts with opening the lines of communication.
- Requesting an extension of time
- Apologising for taking longer than planned
- Addressing an invoice stuff-up
- Sending the wrong file
- Apologising when you can't deliver what you promised
For when things go sour (*cries in biz owner*), and you gotta call them out – or call it quits - for your own sanity.
- Dealing with negative client feedback
- When a client thinks you’re two-timing them
- Firing a client
- When the client quits (and wants their deposit back)
- When they reappear down the track
Snag those rave reviews smoothly and sincerely.
- Post-project feedback (for one-off sessions/coaching/VIP days)
- Post-project testimonial (for BIG projects)
- Request to share project on socials
- LinkedIn recommendation requests
- Asking for a Google review
Navigate the boundary-pushing stuff with grace, wit, and just enough edge to make it clear where your lines are drawn.
- Price push-back
- Friends & family requesting discounted work
- Service-swap for *exposure* requests
- Random requests for advice you don’t want to give
- Wrangling sub-contractors/service providers because their work isn’t up to scratch
- Sharing your behind-the-scenes details without gatekeeping
- When someone wants a job – and you ain’t hiring

... tears in my eyes as I poured through this …

As an Autistic creative, I seriously benefit from language library supports (i.e., what words do I use for xyz scenario?) ... so you can imagine the tears in my eyes as I poured through this and realised, oh-my-actual-goodness-there's-a-response-for-EVERY-HARD-THING-I-HAVE-ENCOUNTERED-AS-A-CREATIVE-ENTREPRENEUR! (Right down to "How do I reject the friend who wants to engage my services, but isn't set up for success and/or isn't values-aligned?")

This deck is for the creative entrepreneurs, recovering people-pleasers, neurodivergents who need language support, alexithymics, the tired, the run-out-of-words, and those who ask ChatGPT for support, read the responses, and say, "Ok, no. Not like that." (LOL) Would recommend to any creative entrepreneur.

CHERIE CLONAN, THE DIGITAL PICNIC