When it comes to creating copy, I’m all for keepin’ it real.
I’mma be straight up with you: I don’t do boring. I don’t do conservative. I don’t play it safe, and I sure as f*ck don’t follow the rules.
I’m not the kind of copywriter you take home to meet your mother. (Unless your mum likes the f-word and drinking wine at 2 pm on a Tuesday.)
I do, however, specialise in creating kickass, click-worthy, personality-driven copy for out-of-the-box thinkers who aren't afraid to spark a revolution. (Which is really just a fancy-schmancy way of saying I write sassy and funny AF words for people who like to be different.)
Look, I hate to break this to you, playa, but your copy is what connects you to the most important people in your business: Your customers. And those savvy mofos ain’t going to buy your sh*t if they’re bored AF by your message.
Because let's get real: Copy is more than just words. Your copy showcases your personality. It’s where your brand shows its (metaphorical) balls, bares its teeth, winks at the cute guy (or girl) in the corner, and struts its sh*t like Kanye on payday.
And that's how I can help you: by connecting the dots between what you have to say and how to share that sh*t with the people who need to hear it. Just think of me as your friendly neighbourhood dialogue dealer; your personal punctuation pimp.
Want engaging, bullsh*t-free, personality-driven copy that gets you noticed for all the right reasons? You betcha’ ass you do.
MY Hit List
Bold ‘n ballsy active language
Branding that tells a story
MY SH*t List
Overuse of exclamation points
The word ‘mumpreneur’
Boring AF copy with no personality
Every f*cker on Fiverr
I'm a born-and-bred, Class of '83, Gold Coast alumni (But don't hold that against me.) I grew up in the era of leg warmers, Punky Brewster, sh*t music and drinking out of the garden hose. I've been reading, writing, talking and generally annoying the f*ck outta' everyone around me with my extensive vocabulary and witty observations since I traded in my nappy and teddy bear for skinny jeans and Havaianas.
Got my start in business admin where I learnt how crap most of my bosses were at crafting a sentence without the help of a secretary. Shimmied up the corporate ladder. Landed my dream gig at global surf giant Billabong International. Managed an intellectual property portfolio worth more than all the Kardashians-Jenners put together. Hung out with the world's best surfers. Had a damn good time.
Wanted to get me a big ol' fancy degree, so I bid Billabong au revoir. Showed the youngins' how to smash Jägerbombs at the uni bar. Backpacked across Europe. Accidentally set my face on fire in a bar in Austria. Lived, studied and taught in Canada. Wrote about my adventures with humour and brutal honesty. Came back to Australia. Fell in love with a scuba instructor. Graduated with a Bachelors of Education.
Spent a year teaching the next generation how to compose and execute spectacular pieces of literature while drowning in a curriculum filled with crap. Landed my first paid travel writing gig. Earned a reputation as an 'honest' travel writer (whatever the hell that means). Discovered more people wanted to pay me to write for them. Travelled some more with my partner. Dived with sharks. Life didn’t suck.
Spent two years living in Niue, a tropical island in the South Pacific. Played out my days teaching at the local primary school, learning the language, and watching my travel writing biz grow. Landed my first major international tourism client. Drank coconuts. Dived the sh*t out of some awesome reefs with my partner. Swam with humpback whales. Missed first-world Internet connections.
Migrated back to Australia. Felt nostalgic for the tropical life. Set up shop on Brisbane’s North Stradbroke Island. Sat down and pondered what to do next. Decided to follow my passion and write cool sh*t for other rad AF people. Rebranded and launched this biz. Promptly (surprisingly, unexpectedly) fell pregnant. Welcomed our rad little dude, Reef, into the world in 2017. High-fived my partner. Danced it out.
But I'm more than just a word nerd with a passport and a casual drinking problem.
When I’m not writing or travelling, you can find me scuba diving with sharks, exploring our lastest island home with my man and our little dude, Instagramming like a boss, sampling the best Pinots and Proseccos of the world (because WINE), and figuring out how many blocks of Hey Tiger chocolate equals happiness. So far, it's not 16.